You Know Its Time to Retire When Humorous

If you lot are searching for "funny retirement quotes", this list is for you! Use these famous quotes to send a boss, co-worker or teacher off to a happy and healthy retirement.

Funny Quotes Almost Retirement

1. "Age is an issue of mind over thing. If you don't mind, it doesn't affair." – Marker Twain
2. "Retirement: no task, no stress, no pay!" – Unknown
3. "Retire from work, but not from life." – M.M. Soni
4. "It is better to alive rich than to die rich." – Samuel Johnson
5. "If people full-bodied on the really important things in life, in that location'd be no shortage of angling poles." – Doug Larson
6. "As for me, except for the occasional eye attack, I feel as young as I ever did." – Robert Benchley
7. "The problem with retirement is that y'all never get a day off." – Abe Lemons
8. "You lot have to put off being young until y'all can retire." – Unknown
9. "In that location is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. Some call it retirement; I call it bliss." – Betty Sullivan
10. "In retirement, I await for days off from my days off." – Mason Cooley
11. "It'due south paradoxical that the thought of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone." – Andy Rooney
12. "Work is the curse of the drinking classes." – Oscar Wilde
13. "The visitor gave me an aptitude test and I institute out the piece of work I was best suited for was retirement." – Unknown
14. "Sometimes it's hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a penalty." – Terri Guillemets
15. "I think that retirement is the get-go step towards the grave." – Hugh Hefner
16. "Oft when you are at the end of something, you're at the start of something else." – Fred Rogers
17. "Retirement is not in my vocabulary. They aren't going to get rid of me that fashion." – Betty White
18. "I need to retire from retirement." – Sandra Day O'Connor
19. "Aging seems to be the merely available mode to live a long life." – Kitty O'Neill Collins
20. "Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save." – Will Rogers
21. "A retired hubby is ofttimes a wife'south total-time job." – Ella Harris
22. "When a human retires, his wife gets twice the married man but only half the income." – Chi Chi Rodriguez
23. "I always likened retirement to falling off a cliff, then y'all take to kind of brush yourself off." – Steve Young
24. "Retirement at 65 is ridiculous. When I was 65, I still had pimples." – George Burns
25. "Yous are never too old to ready some other goal or to dream a new dream." – C.S. Lewis
26. "There'due south never plenty time to exercise all the nothing you want." – Pecker Watterson
27. "As in all successful ventures, the foundation of a good retirement is planning." – Earl Nightingale
28. "When a man retires and time is no longer a affair of urgent importance, his colleagues generally nowadays him with a watch." – R.C. Sherriff
29. "My retirement plan is to become thrown into a minimum security prison in Hawaii." – Julius Sharpe
30. "Retirement: world'south longest coffee break." – Unknown
31. "Retirement is similar a long holiday in Las Vegas. The goal is to savour it the fullest, just not so fully that y'all run out of money." – Jonathan Clements
32. "I have never liked working. To me, a chore is an invasion of privacy." – Unknown
33. "He who laughs terminal at the dominate's jokes probably isn't far from retirement." – Unknown
34. "There are some who start their retirement long before they terminate working." – Robert Half
35. "Retirement: it'south nice to exit of the rat race, but you have to learn to become along with less cheese." – Gene Perret
36. "You can't retire from being great." – Unknown
37. "Some of the all-time memories are fabricated in flip flops." – Kellie Elmore
38. "We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give." – Winston Churchill
39. "What do you lot call a person who is happy on Monday? Retired." – Unknown
40. "People will forget what you said, people volition forget what y'all did, merely people will never forget how you fabricated them feel." – Maya Angelou
41. "I relish waking upward and not having to go to work. So, I do information technology iii or 4 times a twenty-four hours." – Factor Perret
42. "I'm non just retiring from the company, I'm as well retiring from my stress, my commute, my alert clock, and my iron." – Hartman Jule
43. "Retirement is when you stop lying almost your age and get-go lying around the firm." – Unknown
44. "Retirement, a time to do what y'all desire to practice, when you lot want to practise it, where you want to do it, and how you want to practice it." – Catherine Pulsifer
45. "You're retired – bye tension, hello alimony." – Unknwon
46. "Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying nigh getting caught at it." – Gene Perret
47. "The best time to start thinking virtually your retirement is before the boss does." – Unknown
48. "You lot don't stop laughing when you grow old. You grow old when you lot stop laughing." – George Bernard Shaw
49. "To me, retirement means doing what y'all take fun doing." – Dick Van Dyke
50. "Retirement is wonderful if you accept 2 essentials: much to alive on and much to live for." – Unknown
51. "Retirement: that'south when you return home from work i twenty-four hours and say, 'How-do-you-do honey, I'thou home forever." – Gene Perret
52. "Retirement is non the finish of the road. Information technology is the showtime of the open highway." – Unknown
53. "Don't human action your age in retirement. Human action like the inner young person you take ever been." – J.A. Westward
54. "You tin never take the comeback if you don't have the retirement." – Chael Sonnen
55. "I come across retirement as simply another of these reinventions, another adventure to practise new things and exist a new version of myself." – Walt Mossberg
56. "Golf game is played by 20 meg mature American men whose wives recollect they are out having fun." – Jim Bishop
57. "A lot of friends mutter nearly their retirement. We tell 'em to go a life." – Vince Lombardi
58. "In retirement, every day is Boss Day and every day is Employee Appreciation Solar day." – Unknown
59. "Working people have a lot of bad habits, but the worst of those is piece of work." – Clarence Darrow
60. "Coin is something you got to brand in case you don't die." – Max Asnas
61. "I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's fourth dimension for my nap." – Bob Hope
62. "Gainfully unemployed, very proud of it, too." – Charles Baxter
63. "The best thing about retirement is not having to wear pants." – Marker Hewer
64. "You might be on the back nine of life, only it's proficient to finish strong." – Morton Shaevitz
65. "Retired is being tired twice, I've thought, the first tired of working, then tired of non." – Richard Armour
66. "You've heard of the three ages of homo: youth, middle historic period, and you're looking wonderful." – Cardinal Spellman
67. "Goodbye to 9 to 5. Hello, time." – Unknown
68. "We no longer follow traditional retirement models. We have rebelled against them." – Margaret Nash
69. "Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache unless you play golf." – Gene Perret
70. "I work harder at present that I have retired from corporate life, than when I actually worked, merely I beloved it." – Catherine Pulsifer
71. "I am a gratuitous man. I experience as light every bit a feather." – Javier Perez De Cuellar
72. "Happiness is being like you lot – retired!" – Catherine Pulsifer
73. "The coin's no amend in retirement just the hours are." – Unknown
74. "Retirement is when you end living at work and begin working at living." – Unknown
75. "Retirement itself is the all-time gift. No gilded watch could ever elevation it." – Abigail Charleson

Read more quotes about aging, retirement and motivation:

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